Blast to the Past
by fictiongirl8
Summary: A short story about one night on tour where Deacon steps in and helps Rayna out with baby Maddie.


Deacon was lying in bed staring at the ceiling of the cheap motel room, like he had for the last couple hours. The tour had finished their first show for the Kentucky leg and were resting up for the next one tomorrow. He could still hear the crying of the baby, well, he was pretty sure the whole city could. It had been going on for hours, it wasn't the noise that bothered him or that was keeping him up, more of the fact that it was a painful reminder that the woman he loved was in the room next to his taking care of another man's child and it was because of his inability to stay sober. This was his first tour since getting out of rehab and was longest he'd lasted being sober, but it was already too late. Rayna was married and had a kid, with someone she didn't have to worry about disappearing or having to drag out of hotel rooms. He was surprised she had asked him to come out again with her, of course it was different but just being able to be around her was better than not seeing her at all. Now that the tour was out of Nashville Teddy visited every so often but for the most part things were easy going between him and Rayna. In some moments they were their old selves again, talking, writing, playing music, and going out and performing. But then he would go to his room and she would go back to being a mother and the wife of someone else.

He was tired of just sitting around feeling helpless and sorry for himself. So, he got up and went out to the hall and softly knocked on Rayna's door.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," he heard her call out.

She opened the door, the baby cradled in one arm and the other gently offering a bottle to the not so happy baby.

"I'm sorry about the noise, but she just won't go down, and I've tried just about everything," she said apologetically.

Tears pricked her eyes as the lack of sleep and stress started to catch up to her. She was out on tour and if that wasn't tiring enough she was trying to take care of a baby when she wasn't out on stage performing. Teddy couldn't be here all the time and for the most part she was on her own. She was up early for rehearsal, shows ran late, and the Maddie woke her up numerous times at night into the morning. It was all too much and she just couldn't do it.

"Ray, what do you need?" Deacon asked, his chest burning at the sight of her in pain, he wanted so badly to take her into his arms and tell her that it was going to be okay, but he had lost that right.

"I just need to sleep, just for a little, I can't even think and I just-" she explained pleadingly.

He reach out taking the small, red-faced, screaming baby into his arms.

"You go on and lie down, I got this," he assured her.

At first Rayna opened her mouth to protest but the wave of exhaustion persuaded her to accept his help and get some rest.

"Thank you," was all she said.

Deacon gently rocked Maddie in his arms, looking into her wide little eyes. Eventually she closed her eyes in defeat and drifted off to sleep, but her hand was still holding on tightly to Deacon's pinky. He didn't dare try to take it back and risk waking her up again. Rayna had passed out before she her head even hit the pillows. He realized that maybe if things had gone differently, if he had been different, then this would have been him. Taking care of Rayna, raising a family with her. Maddie's grip slowly loosed around his pinky and he laid her carefully into the porta-crib that was set up.

Then he walked over to the bed where Rayna was sleeping. All the worry and stress was gone from her face, she was just as beautiful when he first saw her at the Bluebird all those years ago.

He leaned down and pressed his lips to her forehead and whispered, "I still love you, Ray, and one day I'm going work my way back to you and earn the right to love you again, I promise."

Rayna's chest ached as she heard what he said. It took all the will power inside her not to open her eyes and say how much she still loved him and always would. The only thing that kept her from jumping up and taking him back was the sleeping baby a few feet away. Despite the pain she felt missing Deacon, it wasn't just about her anymore. She thought about all the instability that could come with Deacon when he was drinking and the pain of being away from him was nothing compared to the thought of putting her daughter through that. So, she had to pretend that she didn't hear him and go one pretending that she had moved on. But seeing Deacon tonight, getting Maddie to sleep, unbeknownst to him, holding his own daughter, it only made her heart swell with more love for him, whether she wanted to admit it or not.

With that he shut the lights out and made sure to shut the door gently so he wouldn't wake either one of them up.


End file.
